North Korea, Best Korea!
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
