Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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