East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
