afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
