Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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