I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
