did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Randomize
