Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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