I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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