So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
