we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
