I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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