dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
