You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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