I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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