Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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