I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
