Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
