she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
