Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Less talking, more tequila
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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