can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
