i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
