she takes plan B like it's going out of style
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
