if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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