im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
bring money and cleavage
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
