Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
NoShamevember. You game?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Randomize
