She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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