..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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