Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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