i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
