Her vagina should come with caution tape.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
the room spins SO much faster in panama
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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