8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
