We're facebook friends in real life
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
