Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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