If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Randomize
