David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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