Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
jump out the window naked night went bad
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
