no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
