Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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