so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Ketchup is God's man juice
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
