i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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