Cold hands, warm shart.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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