i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
