I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
