ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
