Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
