I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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