oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
