erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
We need a shit load of segways right now
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
