She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I wish I only lived at night.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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