Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
